Turtle rush

I've been wondering, by starring at my turtle constantly swimming at one corner of his tank. He knows he's not getting out that way. But he just keep swimming at that direction. He stops once in awhile to breathe and then continues.

I thought about myself. If I know doing something will never work I won't do it at all. I won't even try. 

So now I wonder does my turtle has such determination and that I should have the same determination too despite him being so cowardly at times. (I mean he's scared of a lot of things but he doesn't give up) or he's just plain simple minded. 

Oh turtle. I wonder what he's thinking. 

JW

Done with the tantrum crap

If it's 3 minutes he can't wait. Let's not think about 10.

Talking to a friend and that makes him angry let's not think about talking to a rival.

Impatient and bad tempered. 

If I haven't even show my tempers how dare he.

Now I'm done holding in my temper seriously done. I thought this is it. No it's not. Some one else must be better than who he is. There must be. If there isn't. Fine alone it is I don't care. 

Doesn't even care to ask if I'm hurt. 

Doesn't even care to know what I was asking because it was regarding his shit and he doesn't think so.

Thinks I'm selfish he is even more.

Thinks I'm like a princess well he's pampered like shit. Can't take stress like a man. Gets sick or unhappy or grumpy when he has to face stress. 

Always finding for loop holes in everything. That does get him through what he's facing but the future? Not so.

Irritating face he has when he's not happy. I envy how people can be in a relationship for 5-6 years. Maybe distance does make a difference. But what if you get married. There's no distance there. It will get worse then. 

I can't stand another year of this shit unless he wasn't the way he is. Too many times I've complained and he waved it away. Mistrusted him.

I feel violated. Dirty. Disgusting me.

Jw